Hazell Dean has opened up on her experience amid the AIDS epidemic of the 1980s in a candid blog post.
Writing in an extended piece across her website and social media channels, the Searchin’ (I Gotta Find A Man) hitmaker reflects on her close relationship with the LGBTQ+ community and the effect the virus had on her.
“I first started performing in gay clubs in 1983, right at the start of the ‘AIDS’ era,” shared the Evergreen hitmaker.
“It was really weird because at first I wasn’t really aware of what was happening, even though there were reports of a mystery illness filtering through from America from 1981 but nobody knew what it was.
“Like most people I started to read about it in the newspapers. Few will forget the terrifying tombstone TV adverts,” she penned. “The clubs were very quiet for a few months, but slowly people started to return.
“Many of the venues I worked in were exclusively men only and if they were mixed they were male dominated, so when the virus started to take hold it was very noticeable – beautiful boys started to go missing from the audience, and it was impossible not to be affected by the void they left.”
Hazell continued: “People were frightened. Gay men were ostracised, vilified – It was ‘Gods punishment’.
“I met so many people affected by the virus. I witnessed them disappearing. Yes, of course I lost friends I lost close friends and people I knew from the club scene, but no I was NEVER afraid of the men who were ill.
“I would always hug, shake hands, get kissed on the cheek etc, nothing changed for me, at no point did I ever feel uncomfortable with my HIV+ fans.”
Explaining her efforts to support those battling the virus, Hazell recalled one “really emotional” Christmas she spent singing carols at specialist units across London.
“I must admit, I did come home and cry,” she admitted, before sharing another encounter with a HIV+ fan at an airport.
“There was a guy in a wheelchair who recognised me,” she shared. “It was obvious that he was very ill from his dramatic weight loss and lesions.
“I sat on his lap, and we had photos taken together, We laughed and chatted and I hope for that few minutes we spent together he felt like the handsome man he once was before he became so very ill.
“I got on the plane, and again I cried,” penned the Who’s Leaving Who singer. “Our community lost so many so quickly, it was total devastation.”
Hazell’s post comes as her 1984 hit Whatever I Do (wherever I Go) appears in Russell T. Davis’ new TV series, It’s A Sin.
Crediting the show, fronted by Years & Years singer Olly Alexander, of doing an “amazing job of recreating the era,” the Turn It Into Love star added: “For those of us were there, we know that we will NEVER EVER forget the ones we lost or the way they were treated.
“I can never forget.“
It’s A Sin, about five 18-year-olds who move to London in 1981 and have their lives turned upside down by the AIDS crisis, airs Friday nights at 9pm GMT on Channel 4 in the UK. It will premiere on HBO Max in the US later this year.